Month: April 2020

A few years ago I sat in my house trying to think of what to do. My kids had just left to visit their dad for a week in the summer. I could clean the house or watch TV or catch up on sleep. I didn’t want to waste this week, it would be over before you knew it. I didn’t want to sit around and miss my kids either. So I decided really quickly to pack a bag and hit the road. I love reading articles by the Huffington Post. I had just read something about the perfect Hill Country Weekend Road trip. I called my sister and brother in law who advised me not to go alone. My sister thought it was unsafe and my brother in law didn’t trust my car to get my there. But I was single and had three kids. If I always waited for someone to go with me I would never do anything. It was funny how my sister lectured me to check in with her at all times and that I had better answer my phone.

The plan was to drive to Gruene, TX where Gruene Hall is located. Gruene Hall was built in the 1800s. It is Texas’ oldest and most famous dance hall. I wanted to eat at the Gristmill and then go get a beer and listen to music at Gruene Hall. The Gristmill is located under Gruene’s famous water tower. It is a restaurant built out of a cotton gin from the 1800s.  I booked a room at the Gruene River Inn for one night. The next day I would drive down to the Comal River and float the river, alone (Dunn Dunn Dunn). Next, I would drive to Wimberly to go to Jacob’s well. Wimberly is a town everyone loves. It has unique shops and eclectic art. Jacob’s Well is a natural well that people from all over go to visit and explore. When I was done there I would drive to Fredericksburg. Fredericksburg is an old German town in Texas. I booked a room at the Hampton Inn. My plan was to eat German food and listen to music that night and then wake up early to climb Enchanted Rock. Enchanted rock is a pink granite mountain located north of Fredericksburg. Legend has it that Indians said it had magical powers. Hence the name “Enchanted Rock”. The Europeans said that unexplained creaking came from the rock. This later was explained as the mountain contracting at night after the heat of the day had worn off. People still put their ear to the rock to see if they can hear it. And yes I tried it. I heard nothing. After hiking Enchanted Rock I would go to the natural bridge caverns.  Then the trip would come to an end.

There is nothing like a road trip. I rolled my windows down. I didn’t care how I looked. Hair on top of my head, jean shorts, t shirt, jammin out to only Texas country. No one gave me their opinions or changed my music or had an alternate itinerary. I drank my coke zero and headed away from any worries. I like to say that I ate like a forager that first day. I stopped along the highway to buy peaches, blackberries, walnuts, and figs. That was my road trip picnic that sat next to me in the passenger seat. I finally got to Gruene River Inn. It was a block away from Gruene Hall. It was old and quaint looking. I went to check in and met the lady at the desk. It was a Monday. She told me that I was the only person staying at the hotel. She gave me a key. She said “After 10:00 tonight the grounds keeper will go home. If you come back after that you will have to unlock the outside of the hotel and lock it back. Breakfast will be in the dining hall tomorrow. You are our only Guest so would you like breakfast tacos?” Of course I said I did. I got the key and headed to my room. My room was awesome. Queen bed, old firewood burning stove, and a balcony overlooking the river and trees. The balcony was small and the banister moved when you touched it. I sat in a chair very close to the wall. I made up my mind to be back at the hotel by 9:45 pm. The image of me coming back to an empty hotel and someone following me in and murdering me flashed through my mind over and over. So I unpacked and got dressed in Jeans and boots and curled hair. I walked the block to Gruene Hall. The Gristmill restaurant is beautiful. It is right next door to Gruene Hall. I was seated and ordered an Alamo beer and a burger. I sat under all of the trees and watched the sun going down. I looked out over the water. When I was done eating I walked to Gruene Hall. A band I cant remember the name of was playing. It was a Monday so it wasn’t a big concert. I ordered a beer and listened to music. A guy asked me to two step. We danced to a song about Donald Trump being orange. I got another beer and listened to more music. At 9:30pm I walked the block back to my hotel room. My sister was blowing up my phone. I got into my room and candles and flower petals were around the bath tub. A note from the hotel said something about it being complimentary. Again, murder crept through my mind. I eventually got over it and  turned the candles on (batteries). That night I read books that I had brought and fell asleep. The next morning I sat out on the balcony. This was the first time that I started to draw. I am not good at drawing or painting but I like to do it. I am not being humble. I am not good. ha. I drew Gruene Hall. I tried to draw the river and failed. I packed my bag and went to the breakfast room. I sat in the huge breakfast room alone eating breakfast tacos with hot sauce. I was sitting against a window high above the river and trees. Humming bird feeders were placed all along the outside of the windows and tons of hummingbirds were flying around while I ate. I had one of those moments where you just feel like you are blessed to be exactly where you are. Before check out I sat in one of the hotels reading nooks. I drank coffee and read some more. I wished I could stay longer but I had more places to go.

I drove to a place in New Braunfels where you could park your car and ride a school bus down to the river. The school bus parks and you get out and get your tube and get in the freezing river. I floated down the river soaking up the sun. I watched deer run along the sides of the river. I watched all of the college kids drink way too much. The good old days ha. I would get out of my tube and swim for a while and then get back in and take in more sun. I only went around one time. Floating alone is relaxing but being alone in crowds of people partying feels kind of weird. I returned my float and road the school bus back to my car. I slipped a dress over my swimsuit. Then I headed to Wimberley.

I had never been to Wimberley but I had heard a lot about it. I parked and went in to a coffee shop. I got a coffee and walked along the streets that were filled with shops. I went in and bought random candles and socks. But the main reason I was there was to go to Jacob’s Well. I wanted to jump into the well. I wanted to hold my breath and swim as far as I could down the well. As I walked up to the entrance I realized how I didn’t plan for this. You had to have a wrist band. Your wrist band was a certain color and you could only be at the well for 45 minutes. When your time was up they asked for your color to leave. They were completely sold out for the day. No! I thought. I came all this way. As I was about to admit defeat a couple came walking out. I said, “I’m so sorry to ask you this but since you are leaving can I have your wrist band?” The guy looked at me weird but said sure and gave it to me. I had 15 minutes. I walked the dirt and rock path to get back to the well. About 20 other people were there. They were swimming or jumping into the well. The well just looks like dark water. I swam around for a while trying to get the nerve to go in front of a lot of people I don’t know to jump into an underwater well. As I swam an older, chubby man got up on the rocks to jump in. He was nervous and he was taking a while. He kept wiping his glasses. There was a group of high school boys there. They started chanting, “Gary! Gary! Gary!” and he held his nose and jumped. The boy next to me in the water said, “We have no idea who that guy is or what his name is but he looks like a Gary.” Then the boy asked if I wanted to borrow his goggles. I put them on and swam not far at all down the well before my ears popped. I got out of the water and climbed the rocks. I jumped in the well. I hated it but I did it. When my time was up I got dressed and walked around the property. I saw deer and lizards. I walked under all of the trees. I was walking down a steep trail when I fell and rolled my ankle. I remembered our pastor saying something like, “If you aren’t falling then you aren’t trying”. I thought well at least I know I am doing something. Even if I lack any Grace while I’m doing it. I got in my car and headed to Fredericksburg.

I had left Wimberley and was headed to Fredericksburg. I had a reservation at a hotel there near Main street. It was about 5:45pm when I noticed my tire was EXTREMELY low. My tire gage said 11 and it was going down every mile. I looked up the closest tire shop and it said it was 15 miles away. I called them and they said that if I could get there by 6:00 they could look at it. I had 15 minutes and 15 miles to get to a place I had never been before I was left on the side of the road with a flat tire. I got there and they fixed it in 10 minutes. (This is where it comes in that it might not be wise to travel alone). Then I went to my hotel. I checked in to my room, got dressed, and went to main street. I ate at a place called Otto’s. I sat outside under Edison lights and drank a German beer while I ate German food. Then I walked to a bar and had a beer while I listened to the cutest old man sing and play his guitar. I got back to my hotel and showered and slept.

The next morning I woke up very early. I packed my backpack with drawing materials, books, water, sunscreen, and a polaroid camera my sister had bought me. (This is way too much weight to hike with, I learned that quickly). I was ready to hike Enchanted Rock. A lot of people I knew had already done this and I had always wanted to. I went down to the lobby to get coffee first. In the back of the hotel there was land to walk around. There was a stream that I sat next to while I drank coffee. It was probably 6am. I loved it. When I got to Enchanted rock I went inside to pay for a ticket. It was early and only about 10 people were inside but people were freaking out. I asked a girl what was going on. A Spurs player was there and everyone was trying to get a picture. I’m sorry I cant tell you who it was because I have no idea. I got my ticket and left. I saw the poor guy basically running out of the office as I walked away. He got a ticket and was trying to get away from the teenage girls who probably never watched any of the games. It is a big rock and I didn’t see him again. It is beautiful out there. The rock has a lot of paths, easy and hard. I saw couples and kids and families all hiking up to the top. As I was out of breath and hiking a lady came up to me. She had two kids with her. She said, “Excuse me miss but are you hiking alone?” I said yes. She said to her kids, “I told you she was hiking alone. Isn’t that brave guys?” Then she asked me if I would like to hike with them. I politely said thank you but that I was okay. I later told my brother that story and he said, “Why the hell would you want to hike with a random family for?” ha I don’t know but I’m sure she was just very nice. Probably half way up the rock I sat by myself next to a cactus with flowers. I got out my drawing stuff and started to draw probably the worst cactus ever imagined. A man stopped and said, “Are you an artist?” I said, “Oh God no, I’m terrible. I just like to do it.” He began telling me how I am probably being modest and how his son wanted to be an artist. He said his son was at the top of the rock but maybe he could see some of my drawings when he came down. I again told the man that I was in no way an artist and he didn’t want to use me as an example. He did not listen and said they would find me on the way down. I took a different way down. I finished my terrible drawing and hiked to the top. I stood at the top with wind blowing and hawks flying above me. I towered over all of the trees and land below. I stayed there for a while and then hiked back down and got to my car.

The Natural bridge caverns are right next to Enchanted rock. I bought a ticket and spent 45 minutes walking through them. I saw stalactites and stalagmites. I saw a room called the room of Giants. The tour ended and I headed to Main street to eat at the Old German Bakery. That’s the name of the place, “Old German Bakery”. I sat at a table and ordered coffee and all the food. I got German pancakes which are flat dense pancakes. I got a pastry from the huge display case and I ate German sausage. I people watched and thought about how one day I would write about this trip. I finished eating and visited the pioneer museum. You walk through pioneer homes and businesses. Beware the creepy mannequins that are in some of these houses. This was the final plan I had for my trip. It was time to go home. I got in my car and got back on the highway. Not too long after I was back on the road I saw a small road sign for Luckenbach. I had heard a lot about Luckenbach. I turned. Luckenbach is an unincorporated community 13 miles from Fredericksburg. It is famous for country music and good BBQ. It has a post office and saloon on the property that dates back to the 1800s. It is now used for a venue for country music and has become a spot that draws tourists in. Willie Nelson has been known to visit there. I was on a dirt road for a long time when my GPS stopped getting signal. Great, I was going to be lost in the middle of nowhere. Then I saw a sign that said Luckenbach loop. And another sign that said “Park Yonder”. I parked in a dirt parking lot and walked up to the old post office. I walked inside to find a shop and a bar. A dead possum was stuffed and in a display case. A Rooster named Rusty walked around the shop. He has his own facebook page. There was a truck selling BBQ so I bought some and a coke. I sat at a table while three men with beards played their guitars and sang. I felt far away from home. I walked around the land and across a bridge and sat under huge trees. I loved feeling far away from everything. But I also knew my kids would be home in two days. I had a great trip. It was better than I expected. But I was ready to go home. I got in my car, rolled the windows down, put on Texas country and drove back home.

A couple years later my mom and I took my kids to Fredericksburg. They hiked Enchanted rock. They ate peaches from the stands along the highway. We stayed at a small motel and they swam in the pool and ate German food. They even got shirts that say “I don’t give a schnitzel”. I took them to Luckenbach where they ate BBQ and pet the Rooster. Jack even found a pocket knife buried in the dirt by one of the huge trees. A solo road trip is something I think everyone should do. It was such a good experience for me. But taking your kids on trips like this is the best. Going with your significant other is awesome too. Duane and I have been back to Fredericksburg and have had new experiences. We ate at a restaurant that is technically underground and stayed in a cabin from the 1800s. We ate peach ice cream and hiked Enchanted rock together. We went to a winery and to Arc de Texas to see amazing views. If you do decide to go on a solo trip, that’s awesome! But a few tips…. Maybe don’t stay at a hotel as the only guest. It has a major “The Shining” vibe. And check your tires before you go. Make sure you have bought wristbands ahead of time if you need them. And have an uptight sister who bosses you around makes you check in with her 20 times a day. But besides that I highly recommend it. Thanks for reading.

 

So, How has quarantine been treating you? The videos I have watched about covid-19 and the news scares me so I am all about quarantining… But! It is rough! In no way does our “rough” compare to all of the medical field and sick people around the world. But none the less, for all of the people at home we are still dealing with our own form of “rough”. I have a first, second, and third grader at home. We do school work Monday through Friday for a few hours each day. I have actually been surprised at how well it has worked out. Their teachers are super organized and helpful. The kids definitely fight me on it but I am a master at bribing. But it is a lot! I am ashamed about the amount of times I have to google things for 3rd grade math and science. Is this a larva? Is a rhombus also a parallelogram? Aghh! Or try explaining cause and effect to my son who is yelling “blast off!” and running in place. ADHD does not go away for a pandemic. We were just told that schools are officially not going back this year. We all knew this was coming. But that means 6 more weeks of homeschooling. Deep breath. But, there have been some benefits to doing school with my kids. We sleep in a little and eat breakfast without rushing. Now they even help to make the breakfast sometimes. We complete an assignment and then go for a walk, bike ride, jump on the trampoline, watch a show, or play a game. We finish more school. We make lunch and eat together… Unless I hide in my room to get a little space while they eat. Then more school and then I tell them, “OKay, you finished for today! you are free!” And they run off as fast as they can. The kids are getting a lot more down time. Kiley used to cry sometimes after school because she was tired. We aren’t running to basketball or juijitsu or gymnastics after school now. We are playing, planting gardens, camping on the patio, baking everything, drawing, painting, doing so many things that we have not had time for.

Even though some good things have come out of a forced quarantine there is no denying that the days are running together and sanity is lost at times. I actually fixed my hair one day and Colt said, “You look different.” We set up an office for Duane in the closet. It is his cloffice. I am zooming with my small group at church. I facetime my family and text my friends. I am lucky enough to have neighbors that we can hang out with. But I miss getting dressed, going somewhere, not feeling stuck. I miss the gym, nail places, restaurants, church, seeing friends in person, family get togethers, date nights, ALONE TIME, I miss my brother and seeing my kids involved in activities.

It is interesting to find out what you come up with when you cant go anywhere. I have jumped on a trampoline after years of telling my kids “not right now”. I have watched shows I didn’t have time for. And Tiger King entertained us all for a while. I got a fitbit and realized how little steps I take in a day. I have looked through old photos and memory books. I donated money to nurses. I dropped care packages to people with the kids. I face time with my mom now. I wonder why she only puts half of her face in the shot. The kids and I have picked flowers and made floral arrangements. We have played board games and done puzzles and gotten out play dough. We have taken art classes and painted We drive to drop off coffee and breakfast to Mimi. We refinanced our house and worked more on our budget. We have cleaned the house and organized closets and drawers. I have contemplated new tattoos, new hairstyles, getting a new fence, new careers. We have had a pizza Italian night. Did you know there is a music station called “Italian cooking music”. Try it out. We put up a hammock. I have slept in it, read in it, stared at birds and squirrels in it. contemplated the meaning of anything in it. Started to wonder if this is how you start to lose your mind so I went back inside. We drove over to our families houses and stayed at a distance to see them. The kids and I put leftover Easter eggs in our friends yard just to get out of the house. I have walked my dog so many times. She probably loves this quarantine. I have tried to persuade Duane to get me a golden retriever puppy. I failed. Good call, Duane. We have had all the wine, all the beer. Now I am taking a break from it. I started to make my bed every morning. Read the book “Make your bed”. It is written by a navy seal and it is a short read. I have had so much coffee. We have planted a garden in the backyard. Tomatoes, strawberries, and bell peppers coming soon. I put plants on the patio and have decided to make it a jungle haven out there. Then I fantasize about having land and chickens and goats and horses one day. I have read my bible. I have a stack of other books I am reading or going to read. I have read self help books and worked on our premarital counseling book. Duane and I have started doing a small devotional together and praying together. If that is not something good that has come out of all of this then I don’t know what is. We have made ev-er-y-thing in the kitchen. Banana pudding, beer bread, blueberry muffins, pumpkin cookies, chocolate chip cookies, pancakes, French toast, omelets, peach cobbler, and countless dinners. I have jogged in the mornings, found a snake once. I STARTED A BLOG. I have time now to do bible study with the kids, something I have always meant to do. I will start it and then we forget or I am tired or it is late. That has been fulfilling to finally start to do with them. Laundry and dishes are done daily 100 times. After week one I said, “you use one cup a day and one outfit a day!” We have done spa facials with the kids. They have done my makeup. oof. This is such a rant and I think it is fitting because that is how these days have felt.. like a blur of activities and teaching and trying to think of what to do.

The smart thing to do is to try to think of this time as an opportunity to enjoy what we never have time to do. I know that is easily said and hard to do. My anxiety has gotten worse. My patience has gotten worse. We had to reschedule our wedding which was supposed to be on May 2nd. We had to postpone our honeymoon. But as long as everyone stays healthy and we make it through this I will try not to complain. Kiley and Jack have birthdays coming up. They are 3 days short of a year apart so we always have a joint party. This year they know they cant have friends over. I was so worried about their reaction but they handled it so well. We bought a blow up slide and pool, gifts, decorations, and they get to make their own cakes this year. We are having a party with just us and I think it will be great. We had Easter just us and that was fun too. I missed my family being all together at my moms but we made it work. Mimi even came over and hid eggs for them and air hugged them from a distance. She also made everyone in the family a mask. The kids like to wear them and pretend they are ninjas. Jack wears his on every bike ride.

So the only thing I haven’t done is tried to get in shape, which is next. yay…… We might organize the garage, power wash the patio, put mulch in the front yard, come up with healthy meals, start yoga, go kayaking, de-clutter, send out cards to friends and family in the mail, create vision boards, play basketball in the driveway, watch the new little women movie, whiten my teeth, try “clean” makeup products, or finally dust all of the fans. The kids get to learn how to do different chores. They are about to start to get an allowance and have to budget their spending, saving, and donating. There is an endless amount of things we can come up with to fill our time.

This is a weird time in our lives but we shouldn’t waste it. We all have had our moments of being scared and stressed. We do not know why things like this are allowed to happen. Great advice I heard was that instead of asking God why things are happening, ask him what he is trying to teach you at this time. I am a firm believer that God does not cause these bad things to happen. Everything does not happen for a reason. We live in a broken world and bad things just happen sometimes. But he is with us through them. So while we continue to think of different ways to occupy our time, hopefully we can be grateful for our health and this extra time to not be distracted. Lets keep praying for the medical field, the people who are sick, people who have lost their jobs. We are apart but together.

Send me ideas on what you are doing during the quarantine! Thanks for reading.

 

 

 

Writing about the bible always makes me nervous. I never want to misconstrue the word of God. I am not a theologian. I will probably get things wrong. I only can write about my own experience and perceptions. I don’t always enjoy reading the bible. But I love those aha moments that make you stop and think, “wow, that was God talking to me.” Or the times that make you just revel in the awe of God and Jesus.

One of my favorite parts of the bible is about Peter. He was one of the 12 disciples of Jesus. Why do I like this story? Because I can apply it to my life. I see myself in Peter. Humans are imperfect, sinful, going to fail and fall short no matter what. Peter definitely falls short. He loved Jesus. He told Jesus that he would go to prison for him or die for him. But Jesus knows our hearts. He knew peters heart. He told peter, ” Peter, let me tell you something. Before the rooster crows tomorrow morning, you will deny three times that you even know me.”

Jesus is betrayed by Judas and is arrested. He is taken to the high priest’s home. Peter follows them. The guards sit around a fire in the courtyard and Peter joins them. A servant girl points him out as one of Jesus’s followers. Peter said, “Woman, I don’t even know him.” Then another person said, “You must be one of them.” Peter said, “No, Man, I’m not!” About an hour later someone else insisted, “This must be one of them, because he is Galilean, too.” But Peter said, “Man, I don’t know what you are talking about.” While he was still talking he heard the rooster crow. At that moment the Lord turned and looked at Peter. Peter remembered what Jesus had said and he left the courtyard and wept bitterly.

It sent shivers down my body when I read that the Lord turned and looked at him at the moment the rooster crowed. Can you imagine? Peter did love Jesus. He feared for his own life. I can sympathize with that. How do we know that we would be brave enough to die for what we believe in or for who we love. I constantly pray thanking God for continuing to seek after me while I stray for him over and over. Jesus knew that Peter was going to sin against him and he prayed for him. Peter repented and Jesus forgave him. He forgives us over and over.

Jesus was crucified and rose from the grave. When Peter heard that Jesus’s body was not in the tomb he ran there to see for himself. Jesus appeared to his disciples several times. One of those times Peter was on a boat fishing. When he knew he saw Jesus on land he jumped into the water to swim to him. The rest of the men stayed on the boat and made their way to the land. Then Jesus has a talk with Peter. Jesus asks Peter three times, “Peter, do you love me?” If you look at the Greek translation the questions sound like this: ” Do you love me? Do you really love me? Are you even my friend?” The conversation goes like this:

Jesus: Peter, Do you love me?

Peter: Yes, Lord. You know I love you.

Jesus: Then feed my lambs. Peter, do you really love me?

Peter: Yes, Lord. You know I love you.

Jesus: Then take care of my sheep. Peter, Are you even my friend?

Peter: Lord, you know everything. You know that I love you.

Jesus: Then feed my sheep.

Jesus continued talking to Peter, revealing to him that he would die a death that glorified God. That he would be persecuted. Then Jesus said, “Follow me.” Peter spent his life leading people to Jesus. Christianity was outlawed in Rome. Peter was crucified during the persecution of Nero. It is claimed that he requested to be crucified upside down because he felt unworthy to die in the same manner as Jesus and that the Romans agreed.

I think we can agree that Peter royally screwed up. Then we see him repent and be forgiven. And we see him prove his loyalty and love and devotion to Jesus. Even to death. When I first read Jesus asking Peter three times, “Peter, Do you love me?” It moved me. Peter had been a disciple of Jesus and had gone back to being a fisherman. His savior and friend had stared him in the eyes as he betrayed him. He probably felt lower than low. Peter had denied Jesus three times. Then Jesus gives him three chances to say that he loved him. Jesus was preparing Peter for the future but it also reminded me of parenting. Jesus’s love for us often reminds me of the love I have for my kids. They mess up and can make me irate. But I always want to put my arms around them and tell them I will always forgive them and they have the chance to make better decisions and be better people.

Peter denied Jesus. But Jesus still loved him and used him to spread the word about Jesus, the savior. Do you think that you have done too many bad things to be loved by God or saved? You haven’t. There is nothing bad enough that God has not already forgiven. It does not matter what you have done. God will still use you. There is still a plan for you. We are human and imperfect. We will sin and mess up. But God is always there waiting for you to turn back to him. He is a loving father that wants a relationship with you. All of our sins were forgiven at the cross when Jesus died in our place.  Jesus asked Peter “Do you love me?” Isn’t he asking us the same question. He told Peter to follow him. Are we? Thanks for reading.

 

There is a story in my family that I have loved since I was a child. My great grandmother was the sweetest human to ever live. The story I knew went like this: Granny and Grandpa were in love but they were poor. He wanted to give her a wedding ring but he didn’t have the money. So he got a nickel and melted it down and made her a ring. She loved it. She cherished it. She never took it off. Eventually the back of the ring was completely wearing away. Grandpa bought granny a real wedding ring. But she always preferred the nickel. I imagine myself hearing that story as a kid with hearts in my eyes. How lovely. But when you hear the rest of the story the hearts go away and the story has a whole new meaning.

I have few memories of my great grandmother. Her name was Dovie.  We all called her granny. She was small and quiet with white hair. I remember she always gave me socks, underwear, and $5 on birthdays. I remember her 80th birthday cake having so many candles and the fire getting high. I remember her teaching me to read the bible, a memory I now love to look back on. Honestly, I didn’t know her very well. As an adult, the stories that I have heard make me want to go back in time and get to know a woman like that.

She was married to Grandpa. They were married very young. The nickel ring is a true story. He promised her a good life and that they would travel. Traveling never really happened. Grandpa’s real name was James Steveson. He owned a body shop that was attached to their house with an arc. He called the shop Steve’n Son Shop.

He was a mean drunk. He hit her. She would make dinner and he would throw it off the table. He would pull his pocket knife out and tell the grandkids that he would cut their ears off. He kept a fifth of whisky that was wrapped in a paper bag under his chair. The chair that was only his and no one else could sit in. My mom remembers him sitting in that chair when she was a child. The chair was in front of the kitchen. My mom walked outside and around the house into the back to talk to granny in the kitchen so that she wouldn’t have to walk by him.  Granny didn’t drink. She didn’t drive. She would be at home taking care of the kids, cooking, and cleaning while grandpa was in another county with his girlfriend. They lived in a dry county so he would take his girlfriend across the county line to the dive bars in that area. The only time granny drove was when she would go pick him up because he was too drunk to drive. When grandpa’s mother was in the hospital he brought his girlfriend with him, while granny was there. Can you imagine picking up your drunk husband from a date he was on with another woman? Can you imagine him bringing her around you? Can you imagine picking dinner up off the floor after he throws it off the table? Can you imagine seeing him passed out on the couch after he has hit you?

Rumor has it that her son got into a fist fight with Grandpa because he had once again hit her. Grandpa was left with two black eyes and never hit granny again. Another Rumor spread around our family that Grandpa decided to throw dinner off the table again and granny hit him upside the head with a frying pan. Man, I hope that part is true. My mom asked her once, “Granny, why did you marry Grandpa?” She said, “oh honey, he was so debonaire.”

Granny’s daughter, Minnie, committed suicide. How much can one woman take? My mom loved spending time with Granny. She remembers spending the night with her and laying on a pallet. Granny said she was going to walk to the cemetery early in the morning to visit her daughter but then she would be back. But my mom wanted to go. Granny said ok but told her they would have to get up very early. My mom walked with her about a mile along the busy highway to get to the cemetery. Granny made this walk every day to visit her daughter’s grave. She told my mom that at one time she had thought that she just couldn’t take it, the pain was too much. She was thinking about walking in front of one of the eighteen wheelers that kept passing by her as she walked on the side of the road. But she told my mom that she just couldn’t do that to the driver. That is classic Granny for you. She couldn’t hurt anyone.

Grandpa died in his 60s. It was a heart condition but I’m sure the drinking didn’t help. Granny lived into her 80s. Granny ended up living with her daughter, My aunt Martha. Aunt Martha said she was thankful to get to enjoy 20 years with granny without grandpa. My aunt Martha was beautiful when she was young. Elvis once walked into a fast food restaurant in Lufkin, Texas and asked my Aunt Martha to go on the road with him. She didn’t know who he was, he wasn’t that famous yet. She told him no, that she was going to college. She became a teacher. She married my Uncle Ronny who was a Judge in Galveston County. I once worked as a law clerk and the lawyer I worked for had a sketch of my uncle with a mean face in her office. I said “That’s my uncle!” She said ” OH my God, you are related to Hang em High Wilson?” I guess he was pretty tough in the court room but I only saw him as sweet uncle Ronny with his suspenders and tie. I remember going to their house for family events. They had a wall of books and my sister and I found some of those fake books that are empty that you hide things in. We thought that was so cool. I have one now :).But I digress, they took great care of Granny.

There were two grannies in our family so my sister, Tina, decided to call this granny, Fat granny. She was the chubbier one. Granny laughed and signed her cards as  “Fat Granny”. She was a Christian woman. She read her bible and went to church. But you knew she was Christian by the way she lived her life. My Uncle Ron always refused to go to church but he started to go because of Granny. He said he would never be good like granny, he just didn’t have it in him. But he would do anything for Granny so he went to church. In her older age she would go to the senior center. A man there asked her to go get an ice cream cone. My aunt took them. It made another lady at the center jealous and granny said she was “tickled”. Isn’t that the cutest thing ever? We went to see her when she was close to dying. I sang to her while she laid in bed. She said “I see him, I see him”. I asked her, “who do you see?” but she never answered me. She was on a lot of meds and She had also seen dogs and other hallucinations. But I always wonder who she saw.

I started this out wanting to write about the “nickel ring” but as I interviewed people to get facts right I realized it is only a detail. The better story is the one about Dovie Steveson. If ever a name was so right for someone it was hers. She was sweet and peaceful like a dove. No one would have ever known about the things that she went through. She dealt with so many hard things in her life and still kept her faith and it was seen by everyone in her family. I know one day I will see her again and I look forward to that. Thanks for reading.